Or, if you are in Ireland and spot a very tall 'n skinny guy wearing a goofy woolen hat, walking crooked, eating a Bewley's caramelised biscuit, listening to an iPod while leaning curiously over the edge of a cliff and smiling like he just time travelled back to the nineteen-eighties for a nightcap with Sheena Easton, feel free to approach him....he is fairly harmless and will work for chocolate and/or film.

b y---J o h n---M i c h a e l---N i k o l a i

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